The Economy

You know, it certainly is a nice thing to worry about whether you're getting a raise and how much it might be. Nice, that is, as compared to the times 18 to 36 months ago when you were thinking about the bare minimum amount of money that you and your wife could live on, should one or the other lose his job.

Yeah, his job, since the wife is in one of those extremely stable occupations (think funeral homes) that isn't subject to the normal business cycle. So I would've been the one canned, you can be sure.

But it didn't happen, and business has picked up. Picked up so much that this fiscal year might just be the division's first profitable one.... ever. And that's something that the company as a whole could really use to dress up next year's annual report and outlook.

So anyway, we've already had our annual reviews. Two weeks ago now. And everyone's walking around on eggshells and scarcely breathing, wondering when the other shoe -- the shoe that maybe has some extra cash in it -- is going to drop. One pay period in May has already gone by with nary a peep on this topic, and in May everyone is technically on whatever their "new" wage is supposed to be. So whenever the raises or absence thereof get sprung on us, that's all retroactive.

And whenever we get the news, everyone will want to know things like, "What was the range?" and "How was this decision arrived at?" People with years of experience observing this process have given up trying to guess it out in advance. Will the company reward the remaining employees for sticking it out through two years of aggressive downsizing and cost cutting? Will the sudden upswing in sales and productivity be noticed? Or is that all deferred in the name of ongoing budget restraints and the fact that "you haven't turned a net profit yet?"

Will employees who were awarded stock options in the past continue to receive stock options? I sure hope so.

But this all brings me to an as-yet little-observed phenomenon, since most people's capacity for attentiveness to national matters has been swallowed up by Abu Ghraib's amateur pornography ring. And that is inflation. For the year to date, if I read this right, inflation has been heating up at a core (annualized) rate of about three percent. If you don't toss in the seasonal fudges and you also leave in the very real rising energy costs, it's more like five percent. So if I don't see a raise up around four percent, I don't figure I'm making much progress this year. Because while the company is giving, stingily-like, with the one hand, it is most definitely taking every February when the insurance premiums go up and big hunks are passed down unto us. So the annual pay raise has to first cancel what are essentially the February pay cuts. "Cost sharing measures," if you enjoy hanging out with the people in HR.

And this scarcely begins to address my increases in skills and productivity over the past year. My job duties are expanding at a double-digit clip; shouldn't my compensation? Kindly fill my duffel with large-denomination currency, please.